Reading the right-wing blogs so you don't have to … I went around some of the differently-winged blogs to get a taste of how the other side reacted to Al Gore's Nobel, and it was depressingly, embarassingly predictable:
If you look on the front pages of our nation's major newspapers you might learn that a loudmouth poseur and fabulist is set to win the Nobel Peace Prize …
Former Vice President Al Gore how has a Nobel Peace Prize to go along with his Oscar for his efforts to advance the cause of global warming by misstating data and frankly lying about its effects.
When did the Nobel Peace Prize go off the tracks? Today's award to Al Gore and the IPCC “for their efforts to build up and disseminate greater knowledge about man-made climate change, and to lay the foundations for the measures that are needed to counteract such change” fits in with a subset of cosmopolitan frauds, fakers, murderers, thieves, and no-accounts going back about twenty years … (etc.)
And Andrew Sullivan's place has been hijacked by a twelve-year-old girl:
I admire Gore in many ways – especially his knowledge of science and his concern with civil liberties. But he's also insufferable. And can you imagine how more pompous he's going to be now?
Pot, kettle, yadda yadda. He also responds with a South Park YouTube mocking Gore, which has got to be some corollary of Godwin's Law: If you resort to the great wisdom of South Park to mock someone you don't like, you lose.*
… and so on.
I have long been amazed at the lockstep conformity into which so many conservatives fall on global warming: What's in it for them? Why is it unthinkable to look at the plain evidence — trying really, really hard to forget about Al Gore's pasty face, bubble butt, Eurosocialist-ass Nobel Prize and general insufferability — and conclude that gosh, we're causing some seriously dangerous stuff to happen? No, it's impossible, because Al Gore is so awful, such a bad, lousy guy, that nothing he says can possibly be true.
Well, if we're going to win this thing — and we have to — we have some choices:
- We can use all the sweet reasonableness, patience, and persuasion we have with these folks. Somehow do a Gandhi/Bono with bloggers, columnists, members of Congress, and give them an opportunity to climb down gracefully;
- Or leave them out there on a limb, gleefully sawing away, trusting that as the real world continues to turn, they'll become ever more and more marginal to the national conversation, and therefore less of a nuisance.
I've said in the past that I'm done arguing about whether global warming is real … I don't know, maybe that's not the right tack. Maybe we should open up that topic of discussion again, hoping to keep people around long enough to actually listen. I have to say that sounds painful, but if I thought it would be helpful I'd do it.
Or we could just go with this much bolder and clearer solution:
Better yet, maybe Gore will make a major speech telling people to not stick their tongues in wall sockets in an effort to save electricity. Afterward, expect lots of flickering lights in your neighborhood and fewer right-wing bloggers on the internets.
I mean, that's pretty much what we're all doing, as a whole. Not a stretch.
*(PS: I hate South Park. The movie was kind of OK.)