A Republican History of the United States

Bob_Neer   |   Fri, Sep 21, 2012 1:17 PM EST
Just in time for the Joke Revue. As a lover of history, and jokes, I have to class this post as one of the best of the election season. [NOTE: This post was written by CentralMassDad. An unfortunate bug slapped my name on it during the promotion.] - promoted by Bob_Neer

The following bit from the New Yorker is titled “A Conservative History of the United States”  I have corrected the title in order to reflect the fact that most of the outlandishness that follows came from Republicans who are not actually conservative.

It is grossly unfair, but very funny.  I knew you all would enjoy:

 

1500s: The American Revolutionary War begins: “The reason we fought the revolution in the sixteenth century was to get away from that kind of onerous crown.”—Rick Perry

1607: First welfare state collapses: “Jamestown colony, when it was first founded as a socialist venture, dang near failed with everybody dead and dying in the snow.”—Dick Armey

1619-1808: Africans set sail for America in search of freedom: “Other than Native Americans, who were here, all of us have the same story.”—Michele Bachmann

 

More of this wonderful history at the New Yorker.

 

Enjoy.

 

Recommended by kbusch, david, shillelaghlaw, tblade, Bob_Neer.


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2 Comments . Leave a comment below.

  1. Credit where credit is due
    (1+ / 0-) View voters

    This post came from CentralMassDad. A bug causes misattribution when it appears on the front page.

    kbusch   @   Fri 21 Sep 9:08 PM

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