Bold Predictions for New Year! (with poll)

Hey, I think I was right about Social Security “Reform” being the <a

href=”http://bluemassgroup.com/showDiary.do?diaryId=68″>Great Thud

of Non-Event in 2005. Gay marriage controversy doesn’t seem to be

going away, but more and more we’re tussling over strategy, legalities,

and other peripheral issues … the concept itself is getting a little

less hot and wedge-y in MA. (And who wants a hot wedgie, anyway?)

So here are some general predictions for 2006:

• Republicans try to hit Dems with “Retreat and Defeat” line on
  
  Iraq throughout year, regardless of the facts; the media covers the
  
  food fight and not the substance of who has the best plan for what the
  
  hell to do with this mess. No predictions for how Dems respond, but a
  
  firm prediction that Reid and Pelosi will not go on the
  
  offensive on this issue, using the Murtha plan as a sword and shield.
  
  More’s the pity.

• Mitt Romney goes into self-imposed exile from Massachusetts,
  
  citing “cooties eeeww.”

• Democratic Gov. primary is close close close; whoever wins walks
  
  away with it in the general, which will make Progs and Establishment
  
  Dems both uncomfortable. (Check out <a
  
  href=”http://davideisenthal.typepad.com/the_eisenthal_report/2005/12/2006_events_and.html”>Eisenthal,
  
  who thinks indie-Mihos is the major challenger to the Dems.) Healey
  
  prints money, sets it on fire with a series of brittle gaffes.

• Mitt Romney denies that he, in fact, was ever Governor of
  
  Massachusetts. (Thanks <a
  
  href=”http://www.haloscan.com/comments/sco08/113528860869352775/”>Elias.)

• The Governor-in-Exile vetoes a relatively ambitious health care
  
  bill, deciding
  
  again to pad his conservative credentials rather than get something
  
  done for MA citizens. I offer no prediction on whether the lege
  
  overrides — if no override, the ACT coalition takes its proposal to
  
  ballot, wins in a squeaker. Healey tells uninsured citizens that a spa
  
  weekend in Vermont really makes you feel healthy.

• Medicare prescription drug benefit, “<a
  
  href=”http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/12/23/AR2005122302040.html”>doughnut
  
  holes” and all, create huge masses of confused, angry and rather
  
  unhealthy beneficiaries pissed off at Republicans. Taxpayers may even
  
  realize (in sufficient numbers) they’re getting <a
  
  href=”http://www.boston.com/news/globe/editorial_opinion/oped/articles/2005/12/31/dollars_to_doughnuts_bushs_drug_benefit_is_no_bargain/?p1=MEWell_Pos1″>robbed
  
  blind. (Healey tells seniors to “ask your doctor if <a
  
  href=”http://www.panexa.com”>Panexa is right for you.”)

• Mitt Romney declares Massachusetts to be a “theory, not a fact”,
  
  with inexplicable “gaps” and “problems”.

• Acceptance of gay marriage continues to grow in MA and beyond;
  
  “Brokeback
  
  Mountain” cited as reason for easing of attitudes. (Healey tells gays
  
  to “Cowboy Up!” and stop whining.)

• <a
  
  href=”http://homepage.mac.com/bgdelafuente/iblog/B1525647482/C793524152/E1816786171/index.html”><img
  
  alt=”Mitt’s view from Iowa”
  
  src=”http://homepage.mac.com/bgdelafuente/iblog/B1525647482/C793524152/E1816786171/Media/family.jpg” align=”right”
  
  border=”0″ height=”63″ width=”86″>The simple truth that you can
  
  barely see those damn wind turbines
  
  gets through to a lot of Cape Codders, who warm to the concept of the
  
  wind farm. Reilly phumphers unintelligibly, Patrick is pleased,
  
  Mitt complains about the view from a diner in Iowa. (Healey says wind
  
  causes
  
  <a
  
  href=”http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A20802-2004Jun6.html”>pollution.)

• Mitt Romney claims that “he did not have electoral relations with
  
  that Commonwealth, Massachusetts.”

• <a
  
  href=”http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:LocutusofBorg.jpg”><img
  
  alt=”Quinn the borg”
  
  src=”http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/f/f4/LocutusofBorg.jpg” align=”right”
  
  border=”0″ height=”100″ width=”129″>Former State Chief Technology
  
  Officer and Micro-dissident Daniel Quinn “assimilated”. (Healey likes
  
  the high-tech look.)

• Mitt Romney moves in an enormous granite
  
  monument of the Ten Commandments in the State House whilst <a
  
  href=”http://www.family.org/resources/itempg.cfm?itemid=132″>spanking
  
  his kids.

• DeLay convicted; blames “vast
  
  left-wing-conspiracy”; after removing rubbery mask, claims he “would
  
  have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you meddling kids.” (I mean,
  
  who believes that <a
  
  href=”http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/1020051delay1.html”>mug shot
  
  is really his own flesh?)

• Deval Patrick miraculously raises more bucks
  
  than Reilly on the internet; chances are dashed when his convention
  
  speech goes off the rails: “And we’re gonna go to CAMBRIDGE! and
  
  STOUGHTON! and PITTSFIELD! and SPRINGFIELD! …. and then we’re going
  
  to the STATE HOUSE!? (pause) YEAAARRGHGGGGH!”

• Romney declares that “We are at war with
  
  Massachusetts. We have always been at war with Massachusetts.”

• etc.

What’cha got?

Please share widely!

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