Apparently, the coverage of his little tax, ahem, kerfuffle, is causing Gabriel Gomez to rethink some of his strategy. To whit, his team of crack turd blossoms are putting their collective heads together to come up with a new, snappier slogan. In a process that I’m almost sure is not at all illegal but which has nevertheless left me scarred for life, I’ve obtained some of their rough drafts.
Without any further ado, and with only a little trepidation, I present the TOP TEN latest and greatest Gabriel Gomez for Senate Campaign Slogans….
10) Watch me run!!
9) What part of preservation easement valuation contingent upon codification of facade appraisal in trust management for a federal tax deduction in contravention of local ordinance don’t you understand? Also, freedom.
8) When I found out that George Dubya Bushes’ Air National Guard duty was a facade… I just figured I had to have one of my own to be a Republican.
7) Hey, I NEED that $281,500! Do you have ANY idea how much a car elevator goes for these days?!?!?!
6) Everybody simmer down and just take an easement!
5) Yeah, right… Go ahead. Tell me how YOU never accidentally wrote off $281,500 on your taxes!!
4) Whatever your problem with money and taxes…my problems are greater!
3) Examine: Nothing up my sleeve.
2) Watch me run faster!!
And the number one new Gambriel Gomez for Senate SLOGAN:
1) Mitt Romney told me that 47% of the 1% completely fabricate their tax deductions anyways, so it’s all good.
