Our modern Republican Party is dominated by its Southeastern wing and what could give it purer expression than its Texas branch. The platform is available in PDF form on the Amazon cloud.
Widely quoted is this section. It is not from the Onion. It was what Republicans in Texas really want:
Knowledge-Based Education – We oppose the teaching of Higher Order Thinking Skills (HOTS) (values clarification), critical thinking skills and similar programs that are simply a relabeling of Outcome-Based Education (OBE) (mastery learning) which focus on behavior modification and have the purpose of challenging the student’s fixed beliefs and undermining parental authority. (p. 13)
You read that right. Texas Republicans want their precious prejudices carefully preserved and any attempt at education or critical thinking that might undermine the authority of their pre-set ideas had best face vigorous opposition. This is why red states tend not to be fountains of innovation.
Texas Republicans, it turns out, pride themselves on being uncivilized:
Classroom Discipline –We recommend that local school boards and classroom teachers be given more authority to deal with disciplinary problems. Corporal punishment is effective and legal in Texas. (p. 13)
Also ignorance about things sexual is beneficial:
Sex Education – We recognize parental responsibility and authority regarding sex education. We believe that parents must be given an opportunity to review the material prior to giving their consent. We oppose any sex education other than abstinence until marriage. (p. 13)
They hate the District of Columbia:
Washington D.C. – We strongly oppose making the District of Columbia a state or adding Congressional members. (p.3)
They also hate environmentalists. A lot:
Protection from Extreme Environmentalists – We strongly oppose all efforts of the extreme environmental groups that stymie legitimate business interests. We strongly oppose those efforts that attempt to use the environmental causes to purposefully disrupt and stop those interests within the oil and gas industry. We strongly support the immediate repeal of the Endangered Species Act. We strongly oppose the listing of the dune sage brush lizard either as a threatened or an endangered species. We believe the Environmental Protection Agency should be abolished.
Their hatred of regulation extends to the right to disobey traffic lights:
Banning the Use of Red Light Cameras – We oppose the manner in which alleged vehicle violations are documented and fines levied against individuals without proof of their having been the driver of the offending vehicle and we call for the ban on Red Light Cameras in the State of Texas
They also want to feast on genetically modified food:
Food Choice ― We support the right of individuals to make their own dietary decisions. We oppose any laws regarding the production, distribution or consumption of food. Government should not restrict non-genetically engineered seeds. (p.12)
On page 4, there is a section against Eminent Domain. That’s good, I suppose, if we don’t need anymore railroads or highways.
They have a few things to say about elections too:
Electoral College – We strongly support the Electoral College. (p. 5)
Voter Rights Act – We urge that the Voter Rights Act of 1965 codified and updated in 1973 be repealed and not reauthorized. (p. 5)
Campaign Finance Reform – We urge immediate repeal of the McCain-Feingold Act. (p. 6)
They have no embarrassment whatever about being ignorant homophobes:
Homosexuality ― We affirm that the practice of homosexuality tears at the fabric of society and contributes to the breakdown of the family unit. Homosexual behavior is contrary to the fundamental, unchanging truths that have been ordained by God, recognized by our country’s founders, and shared by the majority of Texans.
Homosexuality must not be presented as an acceptable “alternative” lifestyle, in public policy, nor should “family” be redefined to include homosexual “couples.” We believe there should be no granting of special legal entitlements or creation of special status for homosexual behavior, regardless of state of origin. Additionally, we oppose any criminal or civil penalties against those who oppose homosexuality out of faith, conviction or belief in traditional values. (pp 7-8)
Boy Scouts of America – We support the Boy Scouts of America and reject any attempt to undermine or fundamentally change the ideals of the organization. (p. 16)
Traditional Military Culture – To protect our serviceman and women and ensure that America’s Armed Forces remain the best in the world, we affirm the timelessness of those values, the benefits of traditional military culture and the incompatibility of homosexuality with military service. (p. 22)
No more safety net if the Texas Republicans get their way:
Social Security ― We support an immediate and orderly transition to a system of private pensions based on the concept of individual retirement accounts, and gradually phasing out the Social Security tax. We insist that Social Security benefits be non–taxable. To protect the Social Security System, its funds should not be co–mingled or spent with general revenues or invested in private or public corporate stock.
Perhaps because of their opposition to critical thinking, they are very happy with capital punishment:
Capital Punishment – Properly applied capital punishment is legitimate, is an effective deterrent, and should be swift and unencumbered.
On page 17 you will find an awkwardly worded but passionate section that advocates austerity. That’s okay because on page 18, they advocate the repeal of the Sixteenth Amendment and abolishing the IRS. On the state level, they want property taxes abolished.
They are truly the party to return to the McKinley Administration:
Federal Reserve System – We believe Congress should repeal the Federal Reserve Act of 1913. In the interim, we call for a complete audit of the Federal Reserve System and an immediate report to the American people.
Sound Money – Our founding fathers warned us of the dangers of allowing central bankers to control our currency because inflation equals taxation without representation. We support the return to the time tested precious metal standard for the U.S. dollar.
Additional fail right there.
That fountain of innovation, California, has so much more junk in their storage lockers.
But I have to say I’ve only watched Texas once or twice. I like the California people better. (Not, of course, due to their politics).
The giant fat guys with the big hats are the best.
I just think they have so much more valuable junk in Texas, if you were going to move based solely on reality television, I would go there and not LA.
I mean really, what more is there to say? Repeal the VRA and privatize Social Security? I know there are people in Texas that rely on Social Security and rebelled against Dubya’s plan, too. But really, wow.