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Write a postcard to (freshly imprisoned) Bob Ney!

March 1, 2007 By stomv

I decided to do just that.  I’ve never written to someone in jail before — and certainly not somebody in the Federal Pen.  So, rather than using the conventional methods of finding a prison pen pal, I thought I’d just send a note to disgraced former Congressman Bob Ney.

Here’s my less-than-classy poem:

So you stole from the taxpayer

to be a Saint Andrews player

think it’s bad in your prison cell?

Just wait until you rot in hell.

Got your own message, or better yet, poem?  Let’s have it — iams, haikus, limericks, sonnets, or even some avant garde free verse.

Please share widely!
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Filed Under: User Tagged With: bob-ney, corruption, national, ohio

Comments

  1. kbusch says

    March 1, 2007 at 2:35 pm

    Where’d your empathy go?

    • stomv says

      March 1, 2007 at 3:19 pm

      because I’ve never been to jail.  I can’t sympathize either, because it’s really hard to sympathize with a powerful and not-poor person who steals from you (and everyone else).

      <

      p>
      Still, I wonder: were I in his shoes, could I have kept my own hand out of the cookie jar?  It’s easy to say “of course!” so I will.  Of course!  I pray I’m right should I ever get the chance.

      • kbusch says

        March 1, 2007 at 5:34 pm

        You know I argue that Democrats have to be tougher. We have to be willing to show the Giuliani-Trump movie, and we have to be willing to emphasize that Dobson advocates what is essentially child abuse so that he is always defending against that charge and no one cares what he the heck he thinks about gay people. I think we should make Cheney’s public image toxic and make mocking Bush even more acceptable so that there is nothing left us to his power for public persuasion. I get all that, but that’s also because I don’t want there to be nuclear fallout drifting through Tehran, I don’t want more powerful hurricanes, and I want Social Security to survive.

        <

        p>
        On the other hand, what happened to Ney is tragic.

        <

        p>
        Yes, what he did is totally wrong. He should have been stopped sooner. Yes, we don’t want that stuff happening or happening again, but it’s also quite sad on a human level. Every human being is tied to others in multiple ways. When he goes down, it also affects a lot of others who did no wrong.

        • steverino says

          March 1, 2007 at 6:14 pm

          This isn’t about a government official tempted by crime. This is about a crime ring that took over government.

          <

          p>
          I’m not going to cry for the foot soldiers while the capo is still in charge.

  2. shiltone says

    March 1, 2007 at 3:05 pm

    He has been ordered to report to prison by 2 p.m. Thursday.

    It’s 2:44pm; can I take my hand off my wallet now?  The citizens of Ohio can sleep peacefully now that this criminal is off the streets.  Somehow I don’t picture him as the type of prisoner Johnny Cash would empathize with…but that’s Old School anyway; we’re quoting Garth Brooks nowadays.  He won’t be playing golf, but then it’s not exactly Folsom Prison he’s going to, either.

    <

    p>
    Now if I can find a postcard, find a stamp, remember how to use a pen…

  3. kai says

    March 1, 2007 at 4:26 pm

    lots of people are going to burn in Hell.  đŸ™‚

    • stomv says

      March 2, 2007 at 9:31 am

      it’s all relative I suppose.  The comment you linked to was intended as advice to religious folks for self-soothing.  Ney is Catholic, so (theoretically) believes in hell.  That being said, Catholics also believe that if you confess(tm) your sins, are heartily sorry, and perform penance, that the sin is forgiven and it won’t be held against you in a court of Hell.

      <

      p>
      So, who knows.  It just happened to rhyme with “cell” and I’m not a very good poet.

  4. kai says

    March 1, 2007 at 4:35 pm

    but here goes

    <

    p>
    There once was a Representative from Bellaire
    To Scotland he flew on Abranoff Air
    Casinos were in but French Fries were out
    And the campaign laws he continued to flout

  5. lightiris says

    March 1, 2007 at 8:31 pm

    it looks like the links are not the only aspect of Scotland in which he has indulged.  Looks like he’s downed quite a few bottles of Scotland’s best Macallan Scotch Whiskey.  Note to the COs:  watch for the DTs–he’s gonna get a little squirrely. 

    • shiltone says

      March 1, 2007 at 10:19 pm

      You know, the Foley fallback; blame it on substance abuse, and it doesn’t sound so much like an intrinsic character flaw (“the Devil made me do it”).  According to the local media, he’ll have booze counseling five days a week, either way.

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