I have long been amazed at the lockstep conformity into which so many conservatives fall on global warming: What's in it for them? Why is it unthinkable to look at the plain evidence — trying really, really hard to forget about Al Gore's pasty face, bubble butt, Eurosocialist-ass Nobel Prize and general insufferability — and conclude that gosh, we're causing some seriously dangerous stuff to happen? No, it's impossible, because Al Gore is so awful, such a bad, lousy guy, that nothing he says can possibly be true.
Well, if we're going to win this thing — and we have to — we have some choices:
- We can use all the sweet reasonableness, patience, and persuasion we have with these folks. Somehow do a Gandhi/Bono with bloggers, columnists, members of Congress, and give them an opportunity to climb down gracefully;
- Or leave them out there on a limb, gleefully sawing away, trusting that as the real world continues to turn, they'll become ever more and more marginal to the national conversation, and therefore less of a nuisance.
I've said in the past that I'm done arguing about whether global warming is real … I don't know, maybe that's not the right tack. Maybe we should open up that topic of discussion again, hoping to keep people around long enough to actually listen. I have to say that sounds painful, but if I thought it would be helpful I'd do it.
Or we could just go with this much bolder and clearer solution:
Better yet, maybe Gore will make a major speech telling people to not stick their tongues in wall sockets in an effort to save electricity. Afterward, expect lots of flickering lights in your neighborhood and fewer right-wing bloggers on the internets.
I mean, that's pretty much what we're all doing, as a whole. Not a stretch.
*(PS: I hate South Park. The movie was kind of OK.)